Monday, April 15, 2013

(Updated) Special hybrid, object-capable, all purpose database

Recently I had to deal again with a special database. Let me share my observations.

This special database seems to have excellent compression capabilities as a ot of stuff can be cramped into it. From the outside the database looks small, but it seems to be able to store 10 times its advertised capacity.

This database can handle relational data, large objects, unstructured data, etc. and has several storage areas and storage types. For the experienced user data access is really fast and it seems index-only. For the infrequent user the only way of data access is through repeated table scans.

The database is equipped to deal with "situations" and act in "emergencies". Its capabilities include having candy up for distribution exactly when needed, a first aid kid with the right number and size of bandaids, chapstick, hand lotion, and some hand sanitizer.When fully loaded, the database can be used as a self-defense device, can be thrown as projectile even on longer distances.

I could go on with more features (you can in the comments), but do you know what database I described above...?

Update: My wife's handbag is one of the described special databases.